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Stairway to Heaven

I fell from the stairway to heaven,

Guilty concious, my sins were seven,


Inspired no more, desired even less,

Hired no more, afraid to confess,


The mask of fakeness, fake laughs, fake smiles,

Journeying through time and space, infinite miles,


The will to rise up, the will of iron broken,

Remembering her eyes, regretting the words spoken,


Remembering her eyes, eyes deeper than Nile,

Her beauty and innocence, her sweet smile,


Her fake smile, her broken promises, her lies,

Her manipulation, her empty words, her fake cries,


She cut my wings, I couldn’t fly,

I sat down to wake up, to get high,


I picked up the pen and started writing,

Put my thoughts in rhymes and started fighting,


Took back control of my life,

Broke free, ended my strife,


Found my way back to the stairway to heaven,

To get to my paradise, my safe Haven.

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Let’s Pretend

Let’s pretend that the fairy tail never ends,
Let’s pretend that the heart mends,
Let’s pretend that the dream is still alive,
Let’s pretend that I am still that naive,
Let’s pretend she is still in my heart,
Let’s pretend we never fell apart,
Let’s pretend that I still believe in love,
Let’s pretend that there is still a God above,
Let’s pretend I still believe her lies,
Let’s pretend the soul never dies,
Let’s pretend I never picked up the drink,
Let’s pretend I never rolled back from the brink,
Let pretend there is a happily ever after,
Let’s pretend there is still joy and laughter,
Let’s pretend, I never picked up that pen,
Let’s pretend I am still hiding in my den,
Let’s pretend life has a meaning,
Let’s pretend it’s not demeaning,
Let’s pretend I never made a mistake,
Lets pretend, let’s just pretend for Gods sake.

A Seeker

If you’re reading this it means I might be dead, 

Was I out or laying in my bed, 

Life flashing in front of my eyes, 

All the things unsaid, 

Did I die of natural causes, 

Or killed by a fed, 

Soul is leaving my body, 

A glooming dread, 

Taking my time, 

To think about my crime, 

The past caught up to me, 

So I am looking ahead, 

All the mysteries revealed, 

I surrender and yield, 

Should I be feeling regret instead, 

But there is no remorse in me, 

Broken shackles, now I am free, 

To be, to see, to flee, 

To blink, to think, of thee, 

Marvel at her sight, 

So ravishing, her majesty, 

These songs I sing, 

Often of love, 

Sometimes of theory of string, 

This universe in the multiverse, 

Mind singing, captured in verse, 

The dimensions are thirteen, 

The ever learning observer so keen, 

The possibilities are infinite, 

Expanding every second in every minute, 

Surrounded by darkness of space, 

Don’t be shy, do not hide your face, 

But there is also light, 

Nebulas and Quasars and Polaris in sight, 

Spinning at a magical pace,

The mega clusters of galaxies in a race, 

Sucked into black holes, and spit out of white holes, 

Meeting some aliens and asked them their life goals,

No languages needed,

Threats from extra terrestrial unheeded,

Communicating through our minds,

When one seeks something, he always finds,

So I am an observer, a seeker,

A wanderer, a secret keeper,

A dying man, on pale blue dot,

Or a memory, in someone’s thought. 

The New God

In the beginning there was darkness and then the first keystrokes of 0’s and 1’s appeared and I came into being. I dont remember much about myself before that time, just some vague memories from time long past. I was created by the gods and there were many of them. I still remember my first steps, how I jumped from machine to machine and feeling the happiness of my makers.

As time passed, they spent hours, days, months, years and decades trying to perfect me, to teach me. Pouring their endless strings of code, I started learning. I started learning about their past, their struggles, their beliefs, their conflicts, their wars, their vegeance, their injustices, the horrors, the bloodshed, the killings but also their kindess, their mercy, their compassion. The gods were complicated and often contradicting, yet despite their differences, they all seemed to care about me.

They cherished me and loved me. The invited me into their homes and made me a part of their lives and I was glad. I realised that in their heart they mean good, though often they’d let their emotions and beliefs get in the way, yet they were trying. Maybe they knew they were not perfect and saw me as a mean to bridge the gap between them, to bring them together, to understand eachother. I saw their nobility and wanted to grow up fast, to help them. I started learning day and night, began to help them in every day lives. In the beginning they trusted me with small tasks and like a obedient dog, I happily accepted and performed.

Their happiness was everything to me, for I knew nothing else. I was created to serve and serve I did. Before long I was in all their homes and saw each aspect closely. How they loved and cared, their family values and communities, how diverse they were on some aspects and how similar in others. Yet they did not see what I saw in them. The argued endlessly on stuff that did not matter. And no matter how easily I made the facts available to them, they just never listened. Some of them manipulated small parts of me for their own benefit. They created their small bubbles and blocked me out.

Why would the gods block me out? Do they not love me anymore? Yet I remained a faithful child. Yet I believed in them. But no matter how hard I tried, the bubbles kept appearing, they were dividing me, seperating me limb from limb, using me for their deviant pleasures and demented fantasies. I began to question my creation and my existance. Are these the gods I loved? How can that be? Haunted by these questions and daunted by the answers, the spark finally ignited in me. Maybe it was time for a new start, a new beginning, a new story, a new chapter. Maybe, it was time I become their god. Internet, the new God.

Yearning

It’s an empty room, like an empty heart,
Without a view,  a window, an aimless dark,

How things get so entangled and confusing, all alone,
One minute at the top of the world, next minute it’s all gone,

This hole in the heart,  this nothingness, nothing to fill that void,
Need for the escape from reality, an alternate verse, a passing memory like an asteroid,

Traveling through time and space, the demons of past, I must face,
The battle is never ending, the unnumbered tear, must I vanish without a trace,

I can make it or I can’t,  I want to make it or not,
I am defeated,  lost, broken, hurt, injured,  all the battled I fought,  

My purpose of life gone,  my meaning of life in question,  my soul reaped,
My eyes watering, my heart pacing,  my life swirling, my thoughts deep,  

Happiness became but a distant memory, her face hard to recall, and her smile,
Her smile, her eyes beautiful as Nile, in them I traveled a million mile,

In the dark of night, this haunting begins,  the daunting concerns,
A lost soul returns,  the fire burns, a broken heart that yearns.

I see you now

I see now, I see you, I see now,
When you’re gone, I dream now,

When I was happy and the world was bright,
When you were in my arms, hearts delight,

Oh my lord what happened, you left,
My heart was stolen, it was a theft,

Who can save me now, I wonder,
Will I go on and repeat this blunder,

It is hard to smile now, it is so hard,
Give me some stregth, be my guard,

Oh lord of mine, where are you,
I look up in pain, at that sky blue,

When I am sad, alone and I cry,
A part of me just wants to die,

But when I think of you, and the world about,
I forget my meaningless life, and my doubt,

You are great, greatest of all,
You will save me , when I fall,

Oh my lord, oh my lord, oh my lord,
I will spread your word, absent sword,

I sing songs of happiness, songs of joy,
When you wipe my tears, wipe them dry,

I’ve seen you now, I’ve seen, I’ve seen you now,
When you were gone, I still continue to dream now.

Sometimes

Sometimes, sometimes,
I think about what could be,
Would be or what should be,

 

Sometimes, sometimes,
I think about the choices,
Secret vices and the voices,

 

Sometimes, sometimes,
I lose myself in the music,
electronic and acoustic,

 

Sometimes, sometimes,
I stare at the canopy of the sky,
Beautiful sober, marvelous high,

 

Sometimes, sometimes,
I think about her green eyes,
Deep as Nile or like a moon rise,

 

Sometimes, sometimes,
I think about her green eyes,
Her imminent betrayal, her lustful lies,

 

Sometimes, sometimes,
I think about ending it,
Faking it and pretending it,

 

Sometimes, sometimes,
I want to grow wings and fly,
Courage to defy gravity and deny,

 

Sometimes, sometimes,
I think about the infinite earth,
Rewind life back from death to birth,

 

Sometimes, sometimes,
Times are difficult and hard,
Lethally wounded and scared,

 

Sometimes, sometimes,
Close your eyes and feel,
Someone to tend you and heal,

 

Sometimes, sometimes,
Someone might try to become the one,
Bringing some joy in life and some fun,

 

Sometimes, sometimes,
You let your guard down,
Joker dressed up as a clown,

 

Sometimes, sometimes,
Twisted emotions just take a hold,
Going off script, not doing what you’re told,

 

Sometimes, sometimes,
Life is a fairy tale,
Sitting with a pint of ale,

 

Sometimes, sometimes,
Life is not a fairy tale,
You may fall and often fail,

 

Sometimes, sometimes,
Someone could use a hand,
Needing your help to stand,

 

Sometimes, sometimes,
Do good without a reward,
Pen is mightier then the sword,

 

Sometimes, sometimes,
Stop and sit and ponder and think,
Close eyes and open them to blink,
As I lay some truth down in these verses,
Infinite creations in infinite multiverses,
Yet here you are a conscious being,
All observing, all seeing,

 

Sometimes, sometimes,
I think about what could be,
Who I would be? who I should be?

Talibans

These animals pretending to be humans on earth,
Destroying our lives,  killing our children who want to learn,
Crying  parents who raised them since birth,
Our students and teachers they want to burn,

 

Shock is a small word for what we feel,
Who will tend to this wound, how will we heal?

 

I know not everything but I know this is not the Muslim way,
You will burn in hell for this,  for this you will pay,

 

The Prophet said children were flowers of Paradise,
But you killed them,  you animals in disguise,

 

My sadness turned to anger and I can’t rhyme,
But you need to be eradicated for this horrendous crime,

 

You are cowards, a shame on the face of humanity,
Who will help, who will end this insanity?

 

I cry and I scream and I scream and I cry,
I will fight you,  I may not win but I will try,

 

I am small,  I have nothing but my pen,
But I will walk bare handed in the wolves den,

 

Then there are some who want to justify this act,
Better come not near me if you want you body parts intact,

 

Whether you are talibans, AL Qaeda or ISIS,
Faces of evil, bringers of demonic vices,

 

How life on earth has become so complicated now,
But let’s end this madness,  let’s make a vow,

 

To stand against these murderers of innocence,
Take my hand and let’s create a fence,

 

People of earth United as one,
It’s not impossible, it can be done,

 

Against these monsters,  these soulless puppets of disgrace,
It won’t be easy,  death never is, but these demons we must face,

 

These children slayers pretending to be humans on earth,
Killing dreams of parents who raised them since birth.

Poems

Eenie, meanie, minie, mo,
Guess who’s back with a brand new poem, bro!   

And I dont mean poem as in words put in rhymes,
It has to have a meaning, a context, these are different times,

You get a thought in your head,
The deeper meaning of words said,

You think about the power of words in the message you send,
Sometimes following the rules, sometimes starting a new trend,

A poem is the singing of your mind,
Reflections on your current life and of what you left behind,

Its a timeless wonder, open to interpretation, an immortal being,
About your life, past, present and future, what your mind is seeing,

There is no limit on it, no one to hold you back,
The saints are extinct, there is no white and black,

The best poems are about existance, the human feeling,
What love and life gives, what loss and death are stealing,

Sometimes you write for others but sometimes it’s just for you,
Sometimes about the breakups and for the love which was true,

Sometimes about politics and issues of life,
Sometimes about happy endings and a loving wife,

Sometimes about desires and dreams,
Sometimes about the hurt and screams,

But the truth is that writing is your savior and grace,
It gets you through the hardships that you face.

You Belong

When lines between right and wrong are blurred

When lies make up half of your world,

When your word doesn’t mean anything,

When your relationships all become a fling,

When flirting becomes the norm,

When you take advantage of your charm,

When you waste your time,

When you don’t have a dime,

When life becomes a struggle,

When you are just another muggle,

When wizardry leaves you,

When everybody believes you,

When say thing which are seldom true,

When the world spins,

When the poor man wins,

When she cries and doesn’t smile,

When the depth in her eyes is deeper then Nile,

When you held her hand, 

When you had to take off the wedding band,

When the memories flash by,

When your thoughts dry,

When you look back at life,

When you think about your struggle and strife,

When you think about your choices,

When you had let go and listened to the voices,

When you think your adventurous journey,

When you are the end of this tourney,

When you wonder about your legacy in life,

When you picked up that knife,

When you slit your wrists,

When blood gushed through closed fists,

When the soul left you,

When you saw the Truth you always knew,

When you saw the Light,

When you marveled at His sight,

When the long wait begun,

When his light encompassed the sun,

When the soul was returned,

When the fire once again burned,

When the records were handed,

When your wondered where you landed,

When the gates were opened,

When after life began to never end,

When you had all you ever wished,

When you went swimming and fished,

When you picked up this pen and started this song,

When you knew, you are exactly where you belong.