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My Story

You may think you do, but you dont,
Know me, who I am and who I’m not,

Person you know is but an illusion,
Dont pretend to escape this dillusion,

This is my creation, my design,
An enigma you cannot define,

But don’t you dare think that I am lost and living a lie,
You will never understand me no matter how hard you try,

But this is how it’s supposed to be,
Trust me you do not want to know me,

You won’t be able to handle this reality,
I am eminence and this my cult of personality,

I am just not your typical good guy,
There is more to me then getting high,

But I don’t care to  explain myself to you,
Your perception of me is not true,

You are free to believe what you want,
Happy sometimes,  life is sometimes gaunt,

I stand in front of you in living colors,
Honest to the core, clearing blurs,

It’s not your place to judge me,
You do not know anything about me,

You do not know what I have been through,
You dont really want to know the truth, do you?

There was once a happy guy,
a nice guy, hence not a crappy guy,
who fell in love with a beautiful girl,
a dutyful girl, her hair in curl,
Her smile made him smile,
Her unique style, eyes deeper then nile,
They kissed eachother, missed eachother, 
Day and night, gay and bright,
In eachothers sight, their lives changed,
Feelings of love, blessings from above, 
They planned their future life,
As husband and wife,
The summer of joy,
They became the reason of life,
In season of joy,
A younger girl, an older boy,
Deeper then deepest oceans, taller then the tallest mountain,
The immortal love reigns,  
Spreading joy and no pain, 
They went to mountains tall and wide, 
No one to see them, no rules to abide, 
With god of love on their side,
They accepted their fate,  
Became eachothers mate,
They married eachother,
Through thick and thin, carried eachother,
He built a small house for her, a spouse to her
He wrote about her, thought about her, 
She inspired him, desired him, 
Admired him, they grew together,
But then changed the weather,
The winds of winter came,
Extinguished their flame,
Killed passion, 
Killed compassion,
Killed their desire,
To hold on, killed the fire,

She betrayed him with no mercy,
Wounded him for world to see,

His trust broke, a hurt bloke,
From the dream he woke,

Into reality and it’s brutality,
The fairy tale came to its finality,

His dreams shattered, his heart battered,
He was fool to think he mattered,

A cursed soul wandering about,
Drenched in so much pain and doubt,

He slept around and started drinking,
Did terrible things without thinking,

His life began spiraling down,
In hurtsville and disaster town,

Then something happened, he took control,
Right back from the edge,  he began to roll,

The experience forever changed him,
Absent love, a reaping grim,

A spec of former self, a shade,
Refusing to give up and fade.

So now you know my story,
Reality of life with no glory.

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Why?

Why why why why why why?
Why do we choose to do wrong? Why?
Why does wrong feel so right? Why?
What makes wrong, wrong?
Why do we stay where we dont belong? Why?
Why do we sin? Why?
Why do we never win? Why?
Why do we make mistakes? Why?
Why cant we do what it takes? Why?
Where is the limit? Where?
Why cant we end it? Why?
Why do ourselves harm? Why?
Why do we have a deadly charm? Why?
What do we gain? What?
Why suffer in pain? Why?
Why go down a destructive path? Why?
Why enter in lava to take a bath? Why?
Why smoke to get high? Why?
Why when we cant fly? Why?
Why not stop and try? Why?
Why choose to die? Why?
Why not see wrong and right? Why?
Why be darkness when day is bright? Why?
Why linger on earth when there is a sky? Why?
Why stand in silence when life passes by? Why?
Why give in to addictions? Why?
Why keep these self inflictions? Why?
Why get wet under the rain? Why?
Why repeat the same mistakes again? Why?
Why not learn a lesson? Why?
Why not make a confession? Why?
Why refuse the help and deny? Why?
Why think the end is nigh? Why?
Why do we have pleasure in pain? Why?
Why cross limits and not abstrain? Why?
Why have no desire for wealth? Why?
Why make efforts to destroy our health? Why?
Why have a death wish? Why?
Why live in a skirmish? Why?
Why are you alive? Why?
Why should you survive? Why?
When will it end and why? Why?
When will I just shut up and die? Die!